Thank Me, Please!
My New Center
Dear Friends,
Some time back, I was visiting colleges with my son, and just about every building had a name on it.
It was never just, “The Engineering Building,” it was “The John and Jane Smith Engineering Building.” Except for the bathrooms, names were everywhere!
There is some part of us that seeks recognition and wants to be acknowledged for what we do.
I joked with my son that if I ever came into a lot of money, I would fund:
THE SOREN GORDHAMER CENTER FOR HUMILITY AND SELFLESS ACTS.
I mean, why not?
Shouldn’t I let people know how selfless and humble I am?
Why do something selfless and humble if no one knows you did it, right?
We can want recognition for many things, even for being “selfless”!
OUR GIVING
Most of us do not have the means to sponsor buildings, but we can explore what is motivating us in any action, be it cooking someone dinner, giving a friend a ride, or something else.
Where does our giving come from?
We might say to someone:
“I did this for you from the bottom of my heart with no expectation in return, and I cannot believe that you did not even thank me for it.”
Hmmm.
We all have “buildings in our mind,” sponsored by us, and it helps to inquire, “What is our need for credit?”
And if we want credit or thanks, can we say to someone, “I am doing this with the understanding you will thank me for it afterward. Do we have a deal?”
So at least there is a clear understanding.
In the end, the most impactful giving is from the heart … we do it not because it looks good on a resume, or makes a cool social media post, or we get to have our name on a building … we do it because our heart calls us to do so.
OUR NAME
After all, our name is just a series of sounds, and we tend to think, “That series of sounds is ME!”
No, we are so much more!
And even the biggest, most impressive building we sponsor at a college or build in our mind disintegrates over time. None of us are remembered very long.
However, knowing in our heart what motivated us … that stays with us.
In the end, that is what matters.
Blessings,
SOREN
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I am regularly disappointed to see so many faith-based institutions--churches/synagogues, education, hospitals--selling naming rights. All theistic religions teach that giving should be "giving without counting the cost (benefits)" and to give quietly and with humility. No wonder people increasingly mistrust faith-based institutions when it comes to moral authority. Seems a blatant disregard for preached values.
to wit:
"‘Inner Net’ exhibits characteristics of Hive Mind. For example – termites are a society of creatures capable of building mounds that rival our tallest skyscrapers in relative scale. Fungi beneath the forest floor form an organic internet that precedes humankind. Bees communicate with plants in a survival symbiosis that we do not yet fully comprehend. These sentient beings create and flourish collectively within domains of interspecial synergy with an order and efficiency that make our atrocious political conflicts here at our self-authorized ‘top of the food chain’ appear ludicrous and primitive. They accomplish all this without technology or money. They operate unimpeded by negotiations about who does what for how much, and devoid of the vanity of who gets credit. This does not mean to portray our potential future as a matrix of mindless humatons. Rather, as evolved beings, our interests will best be served by developing (awakening?) similar sensitivities and channels of communication. As the new humanity, our current climate change crisis might be clearly acknowledged around the globe relatively spontaneously and inspire an appropriate, self-evident local response by each one of us. This is our evolution."
https://bohobeau.net/2016/07/24/care-to-evolve/