No, Thank You
Dear Friends,
I have been noticing there are words, then there is the energy behind words. Take something as seemingly positive as “thank you.”
Some thank you’s are expressed with heart and care, and connected to a feeling. Then other thank you’s are a “should” people feel they must do or an attempt to enhance their identity. Behind the thank you is, “I say thank you to everyone all the time. Aren’t I such a wonderful person?”
It is more of a role we have learned to play in life, not connected to an authentic feeling.
Or it is used as a test, “I said thank you to that person. Can you believe they did not say thank you back?” The goal is to reinforce a feeling of being “better than” or “more thoughtful” than others.
Kids who are commanded “say thank you” often simply learn to be inauthentic. They learn that there is one easy way to get love and acceptance from society: say what they do not feel.
Now, would the world be better with less striving and anger, and more gratitude and appreciation? Absolutely. And is it important to cultivate and support that? Yes.
AND I also think we have to be very honest with ourselves and ask:
“In all we say, how much are we connected to an actual feeling and how much is a role we have learned to play?”
In other words, where does our thank you originate? Are the words connected to an actual feeling?
If it is a true thank you, it does not feel like a “should,” we are not a better person for saying it, and no one needs to say thank you back.
The genuine feeling of gratitude we experience is enough.
Hope to see you at one (or all!) of our upcoming events below!
Blessings,
SOREN
Politics, Democracy, and Healing Division
Online the month of September. By donation.
With Van Jones, Richard Schwartz, Valerie Kaur, Alanis Morissette, and others.
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The Invitation of Our Times: Mindfulness, AI, and the Future of Life
September 12th: In New York City. Join us in person or virtually
With Yuval Harari, Jon Kabat-Zinn, Yung Pueblo, Melissa Carter, and others.
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Wisdom and AI Summit 2024
San Francisco, October 27rh - 28th
Exploring how we can use AI to benefit humanity.
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The Future of Well-Being: AI, Longevity, and Human Flourishing cohosted with Dr. Mark Hyman
San Francisco, October 29th
Exploring the next chapter of health, well-being, and longevity. Sign up to be notified when registration opens.